Vaastu Shastra

Or you can call it Feng Shui if you may. Arrey, nothing to do with that Ramu Verma’s jump in your seats horror flick. Though it’s a horror story alright. Let me cut to the chase…ever since I’d shifted to my previous house around six months back, things had not quite been going right for me. Apart from the fact that it was located in one of the busiest areas of Bangalore, from where I’d to spend an average of 3 hours in transit to and from work everyday, it’s disoriented architecture and lack of sunlight in the rooms didn’t quite help either. And wait, the silver lining of the cloud is yet to come.
My next door(or rather window) neighbours, whose bedroom balcony happened to be just a few merciful feet away from 1 of my bedroom’s window, seemed hell bent on proving their ‘happy married life’ status to me on quite a few occasions.(Now don’t ask me how!) And the baap of all irritations, it seemed their over enthusiastic children had signed a long term contract with some nemesis from my previous incarnation, and thus dutifully started bawling and crying themselves hoarse at dot 5 am every morning.
And to think this was the place I was supposed to return to from a hard day at work.
Charming, very freakin’ Charming!
So ultimately better sense dawned on me 2 weeks back and I along with another buddy of mine started looking for an apartment somewhere closer to work. We fortunately found a seemingly decent 2 bedroom-hall-kitchen in a good locality with 1 balcony facing a lake and another a coconut grove! So we met up with the landlord and lady, who happened to be a cute elderly Sikh couple. My friend started the talk, and was bluntly told that the rent was 10 grands. He tried to negotiate but to no avail. “Step aside and let ME handle the situation now”, I proudly proclaimed. Ahem.

Me: “Ohho Paaji! Tusi Kithon ? “
Translation: O Big Brother! Where art thou from ?
(The remaining conversation in the Queen’s language for your convenience)

Him: I’m from Jalandhar. You seem to know Punjabi too, are you from….
Me: Yes Sir! Straight from the heart of the capital city!
Him: (All smiles) Wah! Now we’re talking! So tell me, would you be staying with your family or….(eyes suspiciously)
Me: No way…just we two bachelors here.
Him: Hmmm…okk…well these are family apartments and we don’t generally give it to bachelors for obvious reasons.(Now I was wondering why everyone said that! I mean are bachelors some kind-of anti social elements for whom a marriage certificate is a pre-requisite to social acceptance!)
But since you’re ‘apna banda’, I’ll be considerate, and that too for 9.5 ! (grins)

Me: Umm sir, that’s really kind of you, but you see we’re kind of new to our jobs…blah blah blah….i’m new to the city….blah blah blah…
Note: Negotiation using sympathy ;)

Him: (It works!) Ohho, I can understand, I was new here once too, and I remember how difficult things were for me then…..hmm okk 9 grands then..
Me: (Pushing for more with my best innocent face) Frankly Sir, our budget was around 8.5, so if you can….
Him: (Tired look) Now I don’t know! Talk to my wife for the rest…..

Me: (To his wife) Oh ma’am….i’m sure you understand….


And of course charming her was easy! :> So we finally got it for 8.5 grands !
So that was how I negotiated an awesome deal and moved into this beautiful apartment, from where I now get this soothing view of a lake from my balcony as I sip my morning cup of tea everyday!

Later, my friend was astonished at how we managed to negotiate so much. “Dude, are you sure….you know…like the place is not haunted or something!”
Hmmm…. I never thought about that! Well, it doesn’t seem to be so far, but just in case it is, then I’ll get another interesting story to share!!
:D

(Pics: From Top – The lakeview from my balcony, middle – the coconut grove from the 2nd balcony, last – Sunset from our terrace)